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Old for me

marți, ianuarie 12th, 2010

Old for me

Because of several publications, should use my photo, I have found time, go to take a picture.
Do not like looking at the lens. Fill in a form sometimes, want photo of using, I would rather ransack boxes and chests, look for old photo, too unwilling to go, make not new.
Such in the past but just. Talk about, like colored shadow sway, time for decades, float. At that time, I pitched two handles, browse kind one, sat among the classmates like a group of same browse, study. The spring scenery outside window, like long countless arms, employ our heart, itch. Where to sit still? Eyes think at book, attention but like titbit of dandelion, it flies all over the sky to be all over. The deskmates, in my quiet language in one’s ear, the peach blossoms in the nursery are all in bloom, do we take a picture? Hearing this speech, I can not even stay in one quarter. Lesson, tidy up another several girl, slip out of school go by door stealthily, the following lesson has been left alone.
It is about ten li from nursery to school, is covered with the flowers and plants inside. In spring, the premium is black and white, a magnificent one. Take pictures the master worker will come. Come from street outside several 5 kilometers, only when spring is in the air and the flowers are in blossom too, his photographic equipment willing to give him a piggyback will come. I am anxious on the way, the master worker is out that afraid of taking pictures. Say deskmate,in,in on the these days such as he.
If really is here, we can jump up. Rest on a peach with all over flower, the girl one by one, is covered with smiles in front of the lens. One while striking, another several glass frame to surround camera watch, surprise one let first, so beautiful. The one that fall into eyes is all in profusion.
Go back to school, form master’s straight whole face anger waits us. I, as good students, unexpectedly lead everybody to play truant, that uncontentious person, can’t help flying into a rage to me. I listen to him training with one’s head low, but the heart can take bubbles, what think is all in the brain, I on the photo, what is it?
Wish to fetch photos with great difficulty. Black-and-white scene, black-and-white person is not that the pink willow in an imagination is green. It looks at to be getting beautiful, carry it pocket, bring, come out, think frequently.
At that time, my greatest dream, had a camera, thought how to strike how to strike. At that time, I liked to liven up, is carrying a plain and plain face all day, it is not held high afraiding. Want, come now, I at that time, calculate very getting beautiful, have youth to be young to act as capital.
Now, I am quieter and quieter, finished. A magazine cooperating well with me should open Pen Association, invites me early, say the plane ticket for me to submit an expense account back and forth. I go back resolute and decisively, do not go. Surprised there, why? Do not you want to see us to see everybody? I smile, do not answer. If change and do it ten years ago, I will certainly like and run over. Now, I see and open it, do not impose, does not extravagantly hope, everything is flourishing and lively, want, belong to Cen quiet eventually. I only want to read my book quietly, write my word, pass the cozy and happy life of my all customs. You like it too well, you do not like, it is unimportant.

Understood Zhang Ailing in old age suddenly, she came and went all alone, isolated oneself except smoke and dust, original but want to try to get quietly. In showy life, to her, is that a tree flower is in bloom, it is just open to in bloom. There is a full branch of flowers again, not already been in former times, has already had nothing to do with her, she only thinks that always goes silently, always in the serenity.
See Song Dandan’s ” happy depths “, such section describes, that said is that she says good-bye to first love lover inside, she still stays in the original old lane son, but he has gone abroad. Ache in the heart, countless all over imagining many years later, the scene that they meet again, at that time, he come back home, come, look for she, on lane son that her live in, first one make inquiries, an old lady called Song Dandan lives here?
I also think so, in my old time, are narrowing and having under the sun in mind hitting, a stranger came suddenly, ask to me, did an old lady called Ding LiMei live here? Her characters, have made me warm for decades.
If so, it is very good.

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